A New Beginning III: A Plan Revealed

"Chewy!!"

I couldn't find that dog anywhere and I was growing impatient.  I knew this was going to be a long and arduous process and I wanted to start on my brackets as soon as possible.  It was bad enough being at his beck and growl this past week.  I imagined working with him would be like wearing Milkbone underwear to the Westminster Dog Show.

"Chewy!!"

I had looked everywhere except the one place he never goes...his dog dish.  If you get fed scraps often enough, you have no need for regular visits to the dog chow bowl.  And since he frequents the shower as often as there is residual puddles to lap up, the accompanying water dish is just as lonely.  In fact,  we didn't bother to empty it the last time...the water evaporated.

A New Beginning II: Man's Best Friend?

For installment I, go here

What a day!

As I poured the belgian ale in my glass, all I could think about was relaxing. Kids were asleep, Raap was at her parents' house and it was time to get my drink on. Besides, I hadn't touched the Playstation 3 in months! Just as I sat down...

"What the hell do you think you're doing?"

Unfortunately, it was the fourth link in my own personal "checks and balances" system. Except in my system, there was too much checking and not enough balancing.

"I'll ask again...what are you doing?"

Chewy was laying paws up on the recliner...how he got his paws under the reclining release, I will never know.

Travis Talks to The NCAA (Jesus--the sequel)

For the prequel to this saga, click here

*On a late Winter's night, Travis Denney gets on his knees for his nightly prayers before finishing off his scotch on the rocks*

Are you there Jesus?  It's me Travis.  It's been four years since we met at the headquarters of the NCAA and while I believe we had a great conversation, you haven't really been around lately.  I realize I asked for quite the miracle last time and I completely understand that you were unable to grant the request.  I just hope I didn't offend you to the point that you are afraid to come around.  In my defense, I didn't realize your connection to the NCAA.  It should have been obvious but it wasn't.  Hopefully, along with all my other sins, you will forgive and forget (unlike Artie who certainly can't seem to forget anything).

Anyway, I am in the process of preparing to fill out my brackets for this year's March Madness tournament and I have a few questions--maybe you could help me?  I mean, I'm being extra careful to not put myself into any kind of "miracle saving" situation this year so I think these are pretty easy and probably would only take about five seconds of your time (especially if is true that one second of your time is equal to a hundred years on Earth--of course, if that was true, the tournament would be over before even a second so you would be no help at all).

A New Beginning?

Another late weekend night in the Paar household.

Raap had already retired to the upstairs bedroom anticipating another long night of Etan's false starts to the next day. Yzzi had a pillow firmly placed over her ears trying to stave off the first one.

I, on the other hand, was once again firmly entrenched in my seat in front of the big screen trying to find another late night movie rerun without "Rocky" or "Terminator" in title. Is it really that hard to rotate these things a little more often? I mean, how many movies have been made since Sylvester Stallone uttered their his last coherent sentence.

And let's not forget about the frosty beverages. Who says alcohol can't help you forget your problems? The feeling of dread I have had about this year's March Madness pool was quickly melting away with each bottle bottom. I started this pool for fun 15 years ago and for half of that I have been tormented by Raap's conversion of apathy into six victories over me that are topped only by the fact that my lone win was the result of a historic national title game choke by Memphis and her own inability to pick a respectable tiebreaker score. Only an idiot would believe I wasn't in for much of the same in 2012.

15 Years of Madness?

In honor of the first blog entry of the 15th year of my version of March Madness, I thought I would take a look at this time of year through one of the most quotable movies of our time, Caddyshack.  How does a golf movie relate to the craziest time of the year?  Oh, you have no idea...

"What's that sign say?"
"No bare feet"
"What's THAT sign say?"
"No fighting."
"What's it mean?"
"No fighting."

The quote appears simplistic.  By itself, without an actor's inflection (played brilliantly by Brian Doyle-Murray, Bill's older brother), it doesn't make much sense.  Seen in the movie in relation to D'Annunzio's younger brother, it makes perfect sense.  Even if he was being a smart ass with his response about what he originally thought the sign said, he is making a point.